Without my swedish safety zone

Living abroad i always have to confront my own private boundaries. Clear private boundaries that - in Sweden - are all natural and obvious barely exist abroad. No one here respects my wishes to be silent or on my own or on a double seat or with a safety meter. At home we are spoiled with almost an excessive respect for other peoples private life.

The laundromat is a very illustrative example. I cannot even imagine a swede gladly holding their dirty undies up in the air for a while - loudly gossiping with someone across the room - before throwing it into the machine. Or that i would - after an evening at the washing machines - know more about these people than about my own friends. Sex drugs and sicknesses are quite candidly discussed. Not to mention all those couples arguing about the domestic burdensharing.

At the very same time i do realise that swedes are unusual with all the space and high standards of ours. Somehow this material advantage made us develop our own culture. A culture of independence and pride that many times makes our lives so much more complicated. Having one's own laundry machine you wont knock on the neighbor's door to ask for some detergent - you will rather walk to the far-away store.

As an observer i sometimes get jealous of this unconstrained every-day life. Everything i would consider so private being so open. But when i become a part of this myself i get claustrofobic and totally escapious. I feel naked and just want to go home.